life at three weeks postpartum

I have mastitis. Terrible, awful, wretched mastitis. I've had it with our other babies too, but I kind of forgot how horrible it is. I'm varying between having a fever and crazy chills to sweating like mad. I'm so dizzy that I can hardly walk. So I've been laying in bed with Ezekiel for the last two days, just sleeping and feeling miserable and missing spending time with the rest of the family. I was up for a while yesterday and actually passed out... that's never happened to me before. Fortunately I had called Keith over and he held me up (while holding the baby!) until I came out of it.

Other than the terrible, awful, wretched mastitis, things are going well. Keith is still home, taking care of me and our children, doing job applications and submitting resumes as much as he can. Our children are all so incredibly delightful that I just marvel at them. Rilla and Abraham play together most of the day, with Rilla the benevolent dictator guiding Abraham through all kinds of imaginary play... grocery shopping is a favorite right now. Now and then Abraham stops to play with trucks or build something from legos or put together a puzzle, or Rilla stops to "make a list" (aka write letters) in her notebook. They read together, dance together, sing together, and make my heart happy all the day through.

Keith makes my heart happy too. Sometimes I can't even believe what a good husband he is. I am so, so, so, so thankful that he has been able to be home with me for these first three weeks postpartum. It has been amazing to be so well taken care of. I can't imagine how I am ever going to take care of all three of our little ones all day by myself.

Ezekiel is the most beautiful baby in the world. I love him so much. I love his funny little newborn facial expressions and sounds. I just adore him. It's probably a good thing that children grow whether or not their mommies want them to, because I just might pause him at this age and keep him here forever. He's just a wonderful baby. He looks like Priscilla and Abraham both did as newborns, and yet he has his own look too. His hair has glints of reddish gold in it, just like Keith's. His eyes have already changed from the dark blue of birth to a clear, medium blue that is just beautiful. His little fingers and toes are perfect. His ears are hairy like his siblings' were. His arms are massive, with big rolls on them that makes it look like he has huge muscles already.

He has a hard time getting to sleep at night... or I have a hard time helping him get to sleep at night... but once he falls asleep at midnight or so, he only wakes up once or twice to nurse over the next ten hours. It is a beautiful thing! His daytime waking times seem already to sync up well with the rest of our daily happenings. Rilla and Abraham just love him. We are still working through little adjustments in our family routines, bedtime being the main one. Instead of reading stories together or individually in the children's rooms, the five of us now pile together on the couch for bedtime stories. Then, instead of Priscilla and Abraham both getting to have Mommy hold them before bed, we are taking turns... one night I hold Abraham and tuck him in while Keith holds Priscilla and tucks her in, and the next night we switch. This may seem like an odd thing to blog about but it's a pretty big deal around here. Abraham's still rather put out by the arrangement, but he gets it, and so we are adjusting.

I've been mulling over some statistics recently and can't help sharing them. Ready? Here goes.

• In the last four years, I have completely carried three children from conception to birth.
• I have been pregnant for 27 of the last 48 months.
• I have nursed our children for a total of more than four years.
• I have been pregnant in 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, and 2012.

Okay, maybe not interesting to anyone else... but interesting to me! No wonder I am tired.